[Libs-Or] Patrons in abusive relationships

[Victoria Mitchell]

Another thing you can do is put signs on the insides of stall doors in women's bathrooms that have information about how to get help (hotlines, etc.) I have seen these in bathrooms at PeaceHealth medical facilities and thought it was a great idea, although I don't know if there's any way to know how effective they are.
-Victoria

Victoria Mitchell
Government Information Librarian
Knight Library, University of Oregon
1501 Kincaid St.
Eugene, OR 97403-1299

vmitch at uoregon.edu
541-346-3076



-----Original Message-----

Message: 3
Date: Mon, 13 Feb 2017 16:53:44 -0800
From: Emily-Jane Dawson <ejd at multco.us>
To: Sue Ludington <Sue_Ludington at co.washington.or.us>
Cc: Taylor Worley <taylorlgkw at gmail.com>,
	"libs-or at listsmart.osl.state.or.us"
	<libs-or at listsmart.osl.state.or.us>
Subject: Re: [Libs-Or] Patrons in abusive relationships
Message-ID:
	<CADwDqf02wtiGwMrb7ug0=q464+YxY=fMTfNoSskFCBHYO5fKiA at mail.gmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf-8"

Taylor,
I heartily endorse the options that  Sue mentioned.  And I think you're right that if your patron is over 18, there probably isn't anything that you can/should do to force intervention onto your patron.  (I mean, so long as you are not witnessing illegal harmful behavior yourself.)

But I think it's also worth mentioning that the relationship that you have with your patron can be a powerful thing.  If you are friendly with her, and if you have regular interactions however brief they may be, you have created an opening, an invitation of sorts that is rooted in something more than just your card and your offer to assist her.

She may never take you up on that offer, but it might matter very much to her that you have made it.  And, if other patrons witnessed you taking this kind step, they may reach out to you, or to other library staff, for help when they need it too.

I think that what you have done so far is not actually as modest as it may seem.  And it is a good reminder to the rest of us that the kindness we offer our patrons can be very important, even if we never see the fruit that it bears.




*Emily-Jane Dawson*
*Reference Librarian*
Multnomah County Library
Central Library
Sunday-Thursday
503.988.5728
multcolib.org



*my preferred pronouns: she/her*

On Tue, Feb 7, 2017 at 4:31 PM, Sue Ludington < Sue_Ludington at co.washington.or.us> wrote:

> Hi Taylor,
>
> This can truly be a disheartening position to be in. I for one 
> definitely feel your pain and commend you for reaching out to see how 
> others might respond.
>
>
>
> Here in the Law Library, we have a brochure display that includes one 
> for the Domestic Violence Resource Center located here in Hillsboro. 
> In addition, in our building of 3 county departments (including 
> Housing), we regularly post flyers (English and Spanish) advertising 
> the DVRC with phone numbers on pull-off tabs in the women?s restroom stalls.
>
>
>
> Might your library have similar brochures? Perhaps you could find a 
> way to share it with her?
>
>
>
> If you don?t have brochures, maybe you could inquire at your local DV 
> center. From the State?s website [https://www.oregon.gov/DHS/ 
> ABUSE/DOMESTIC/Pages/index.aspx], I found the WomenSpace organization 
> [ http://womenspaceinc.org/] located in Eugene. You might contact them 
> to see if they have brochures they?d send for your library. 
> Alternatively or maybe in addition, you could consider creating a 
> flyer like I describe above. I?ve seen similar postings in other public women?s restrooms.
>
>
>
> And while I don?t know that the Lane County Law Library would have 
> anything specifically helpful, I?d be remiss if I didn?t encourage you 
> to reach out to them as needed. The Law Librarian, Neil Miller, has 
> been in the community a while and might know of other contacts or 
> resources. He can be reached at (541) 682-4337 or via email at neil.miller at co.lane.or.us.
>
>
>
> Hope this offers a little something that you/the library can do that 
> might prove helpful. Thanks for being such a kind and caring human!!! 
> We can?t have too many these days. J
>
>
>
> Best,
>
> Sue
>
>
>
> *Sue Ludington*
>
> Assistant Law Librarian
>
> Washington County Law Library
>
> 111 NE Lincoln St., MS #45
>
> Hillsboro, OR 97124
>
>
>
> 503.846.8880 <(503)%20846-8880> | sue_ludington at co.washington.or.us
>
>
>
> *From:* Libs-Or [mailto:libs-or-bounces at listsmart.osl.state.or.us] *On 
> Behalf Of *Taylor Worley
> *Sent:* Tuesday, February 07, 2017 3:50 PM
> *To:* libs-or at listsmart.osl.state.or.us
> *Subject:* [Libs-Or] Patrons in abusive relationships
>
>
>
> Hi everyone,
>
>
>
> I am curious about how people handle suspicions of patrons being in 
> abusive relationships. While I have no concrete proof, there is one 
> patron in particular I'm very concerned about based on the patterns I 
> observe at the library.
>
>
>
> I realize that this person is an adult and that I have very few 
> options, but I do try to check on her, ask her how she is doing, and 
> today I gave her my card and let her know again "if you every need 
> anything, we're here to help".
>
>
>
> I think that is the extent of what I can do, however I'm curious if 
> anyone has had experience with patrons in similar situations and what 
> you did/can do/didn't do.
>
>
>
> Again, I have no proof, just observations and a very bad gut feeling.
> Thank you!
>
>
>
>
> *Taylor Worley                                                  *Youth
> Services Librarian
>
> Springfield Public Library
>
> 225 5th Street
>
> Springfield, OR 97422
>
> 541.726.2243 <(541)%20726-2243> (direct)
>
> taylorlgkw at gmail.com
>
> tworley at springfield-or.gov
>
> *"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, 
> and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." -A. A. Milne*
>
>
> _____________________________________________________