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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link=blue vlink=purple><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Les<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>So, anyone who was eligible for a boutonniere at a wedding was a buttonhole relative, ‘cause that’s where you put the boutonniere <G>.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>I don’t recall that we had a term for that when I was young, but later my mother referred to “calabash cousins,” a term she picked up in Hawaii, from my brother’s in-laws. A calabash is a large bowl that becomes a communal meal pot, and anyone who is a “relative” is welcome at the calabash. I see that Wikipedia has found this as well:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calabash">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calabash</a><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Pat<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div style='border:none;border-top:solid #B5C4DF 1.0pt;padding:3.0pt 0in 0in 0in'><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif"'>From:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif"'> or-roots-bounces@listsmart.osl.state.or.us [mailto:or-roots-bounces@listsmart.osl.state.or.us] <b>On Behalf Of </b>Leslie Chapman<br><b>Sent:</b> Tuesday, December 04, 2012 11:20 AM<br><b>To:</b> Robyn Greenlund; or-roots mail list<br><b>Subject:</b> Re: [or-roots] Buttonhole relative<o:p></o:p></span></p></div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><table class=MsoNormalTable border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0><tr><td valign=top style='padding:0in 0in 0in 0in'><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>I use it in the context of "related by marriage" I remembered it as coming from some fancy French word for button hole (boutonniere; I had to look it up) but on further review;</span><o:p></o:p></p><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'><o:p> </o:p></span></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'><a href="http://www.ehow.com/about_6636416_etiquette-wedding-buttonholes.html">http://www.ehow.com/about_6636416_etiquette-wedding-buttonholes.html</a></span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>It is now just a plain old "button hole" note the space, that makes all the difference in the world.</span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>When I am referring to say a 2x buttonhole relative for example I mean someone like Uncle Herschel's in-laws who I grew up thinking of as my Aunts and Uncles even though they are married to the sibling of a man who married my Aunt. I was easily as fond of some of them as I was of my own Aunt and Uncles.</span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>So when I refer to being multiple buttonholes away from Kin, which I sometimes wander into as I get obsessed with certain names or places, I am referring to people way off of my main line. </span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>I think "shirttail relative" is more inclusive, at least in my understanding of the terms, as I use button hole only in the context of "not Kin" but still "related" while "shirt tail" seems to be more broadly used not only for them, but distant cousins and "honorary" relatives. </span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>I have been confused by that term as some of the people I grew up thinking of as Kin turned out to be just honorary relatives, though I was vindicated in my misunderstanding of the Abbot family as they are at least button hole rather than shirt tail kin.</span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>It is interesting that I seem to be one of a very limited circle of people that show up in searching that term. I have been asked a couple of times to explain other obscure terms by people who found references in their family histories they didn't understand and somehow ended up at one of my "button hole" relative posts.</span><o:p></o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>Les<br></span><br><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>--- On <b>Mon, 12/3/12, Robyn Greenlund <i><<a href="mailto:rgreenlund61@yahoo.com">rgreenlund61@yahoo.com</a>></i></b> wrote:</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='margin-bottom:12.0pt'><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'><br>From: Robyn Greenlund <<a href="mailto:rgreenlund61@yahoo.com">rgreenlund61@yahoo.com</a>><br>Subject: Re: [or-roots] Buttonhole relative<br>To: "or-roots mail list" <<a href="mailto:or-roots@listsmart.osl.state.or.us">or-roots@listsmart.osl.state.or.us</a>><br>Date: Monday, December 3, 2012, 10:41 AM<o:p></o:p></span></p><div id=yiv2003470420><div><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'>I'm guessing it's a variant of a shirt-tale relative, which is "usually said to refer to somebody who is a relative by marriage or is only distantly related, such as a fourth cousin, or is a family friend with honorary status as a relative. It’s fairly common in the USA and has been since the 1950s or thereabouts."<o:p></o:p></span></p><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'><o:p> </o:p></span></p></div><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'> <o:p></o:p></span></p></div><div><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'>Robyn<br><a href="http://rgreenlund61@yahoo.com/" target="_blank">rgreenlund61@yahoo.com</a><br><br></span><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:#BF005F'>Interested in Coos County History? See what's online at<br><a href="http://genealogytrails.com/ore/coos" target="_blank">genealogytrails.com</a>, <a href="http://coquillevalley.org/" target="_blank">coquillevalley.org</a>, or <a href="http://orgenweb.org/coos/" target="_blank">orgenweb.org</a> </span><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'><o:p></o:p></span></p><div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";color:black'><a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/rgreenlund" target="_blank"><span style='text-decoration:none'><img border=0 width=16 height=16 id="_x0000_i1025" src="http://www.images.wisestamp.com/linkedin.png" alt=Linkedin></span></a><a href="http://www.facebook.com/rgreenlund" target="_blank"><span style='text-decoration:none'><img border=0 width=16 height=16 id="_x0000_i1026" src="http://www.images.wisestamp.com/facebook.png" alt=Facebook></span></a><a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/my/my;_ylt=Am0e7aEv9NKVsL2NcjzyGeTpy6IX;_ylv=3" target="_blank"><span style='text-decoration:none'><img border=0 width=16 height=16 id="_x0000_i1027" src="http://www.images.wisestamp.com/yanswers.png" alt="Yahoo Answers"></span></a><o:p></o:p></span></p></div></div><p class=MsoNormal style='background:white'><span style='font-family:"Bookman Old Style","serif";color:black'><o:p> </o:p></span></p></div></div></div></div><p class=MsoNormal style='margin-bottom:12.0pt'><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'><br>-----Inline Attachment Follows-----<o:p></o:p></span></p><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"'>_____________________________________________________<br>or-roots mailing list<br><a href="/mc/compose?to=or-roots@listsmart.osl.state.or.us">or-roots@listsmart.osl.state.or.us</a><br><a href="http://listsmart.osl.state.or.us/mailman/listinfo/or-roots" target="_blank">http://listsmart.osl.state.or.us/mailman/listinfo/or-roots</a><br>Hosted by the Oregon State Library. 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